Overcomes Our Weaknesses...

"Thus, when Heaven is about to confer a great office on any man, it first exercises his mind with suffering, and his sinews and bones with toil. It exposes his body to hunger, and subjects him to extreme poverty. It confounds his every endeavor. In this way his patience and endurance are developed, and his weakness are overcome."

Recently, these phrases from Meng Zi just keep coming to me. Especially when I am lonely, frustrated, lost and disappointed. We were requested to memorize the whole paragraph from the Ment Zi, Advice to Son. Just like the proverb from the Bible, Ancient Chinese also has some advises to be handed down to next generation.

This quote reminds me of Moses: from a prince, he became a refugee, lost all the money and power. He had to beg water in a foreign land and to work as a hard-labor for food. After he had all the power from the God, he failed his missions 9 times even with all those miracles. So this way he can overcome his weaknesses...

Maybe the change I am waiting for haven't come is because I complained too much, or I am not patient enough. Probably because I have too many weaknesses. I know I am not ready yet now. But how can I be different? And how can I endure those blessings and the miracles I am hoping for? These questions haunted me for a while already and perhaps only time could answer them for me.

11-30-13

"I left because you never asked me to stay..."

I like this saying, why stuck with someone who doesn't appreciate you at all? I remember in the Gospels it mentioned that Jesus folded the cloth covered His head when He resurrected in his tomb. That was a sign  to show Jewish that He was not happy how He was treated, and what He meant is "I was not treated right." Most time we just bring the abuses to ourselves, if someone treat us wrong, why we have to put up with him or her? Leave and never come back, and be better, stronger and have a wonderful life...

I am back...for love and for the changing...

Sounds funny, I don't understand why we need feelings. We constantly hurt people and get hurt. and sometimes we hurt ourselves. Slowly life taught me the reason why we cannot forgive others is because we have never forgiven ourselves. From the Chinese culture, we are always holding the grouch grudges that hurts, especially ourselves--I cannot still remember every single bit of unfairness people landed on me  years ago. Fundamentally it is me I cannot let go. The expectation of myself is too high, too wonderful and too hard to accomplish with one life.

I decided to change the man in the mirror. (Can you hear yourself humming...) Very often, every morning I call myself handsome and gorgeous, I am trying to stop say "I hate myself" or "I am so stupid", instead I replacing them with "I love myself". Why I shouldn't love myself? I think I am very cute. The other day girls were trying to pick me up...

See, I am cute, right? (Whatever you say...)